Ask no man

No More Contention is the pursuit of clarity, charity and understanding. Contention arises from the compulsion to have others agree with us. Seeking understanding in an environment of clarity and charity produces no more contention. As Joseph Smith said, "I will ask no man to believe as I do."

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Three broad categories

In a sense, contention is inevitable and unavoidable because every individual is unique, and no two people agree on everything.  Ideally, we...

Wednesday, November 27, 2024

Thanksgiving with George Washington

 Awesome message of Thanksgiving and unity by the first President of the United States.

https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Washington/05-04-02-0091




Thanksgiving Proclamation

[New York, 3 October 1789]

By the President of the United States of America. a Proclamation.



Whereas it is the duty of all Nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey his will, to be grateful for his benefits, and humbly to implore his protection and favor—and whereas both Houses of Congress have by their joint Committee requested me “to recommend to the People of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many signal favors of Almighty God especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness.”

Now therefore I do recommend and assign Thursday the 26th day of November next to be devoted by the People of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being, who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be—That we may then all unite in rendering unto him our sincere and humble thanks—for his kind care and protection of the People of this Country previous to their becoming a Nation—for the signal and manifold mercies, and the favorable interpositions of his Providence which we experienced in the course and conclusion of the late war—for the great degree of tranquillity, union, and plenty, which we have since enjoyed—for the peaceable and rational manner, in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national One now lately instituted—for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed; and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and in general for all the great and various favors which he hath been pleased to confer upon us.

and also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech him to pardon our national and other transgressions—to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually—to render our national government a blessing to all the people, by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed—to protect and guide all Sovereigns and Nations (especially such as have shewn kindness unto us) and to bless them with good government, peace, and concord—To promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the encrease of science among them and us—and generally to grant unto all Mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as he alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand at the City of New-York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.

Go: Washington

Thanksgiving with Abraham Lincoln

Awesome message of Thanksgiving and no more contention from Abraham Lincoln.

https://www.battlefields.org/learn/primary-sources/abraham-lincolns-proclamation-thanksgiving


On October 3, 1863, President Lincoln issued a proclamation designating “the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving.” Lincoln’s announcement marked the culmination of a multi-decade campaign by Sarah Josepha Hale to make Thanksgiving into a national holiday. Although Lincoln wrote the vast majority of his state papers, the Thanksgiving Proclamation was in fact drafted by Seward.

Washington DC, October 3, 1863

By the President of the United States of America.

A Proclamation.

The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God.

In the midst of a civil war of unequalled magnitude and severity, which has sometimes seemed to foreign States to invite and to provoke their aggression, peace has been preserved with all nations, order has been maintained, the laws have been respected and obeyed, and harmony has prevailed everywhere except in the theatre of military conflict; while that theatre has been greatly contracted by the advancing armies and navies of the Union.

Needful diversions of wealth and of strength from the fields of peaceful industry to the national defence, have not arrested the plough, the shuttle or the ship; the axe has enlarged the borders of our settlements, and the mines, as well of iron and coal as of the precious metals, have yielded even more abundantly than heretofore. Population has steadily increased, notwithstanding the waste that has been made in the camp, the siege and the battle-field; and the country, rejoicing in the consciousness of augmented strength and vigor, is permitted to expect continuance of years with large increase of freedom.

No human counsel hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the Most High God, who, while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy.

It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and one voice by the whole American People. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to His tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquillity and Union.

In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand and caused the Seal of the United States to be affixed.

Done at the City of Washington, this Third day of October, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and sixty-three, and of the Independence of the United States the Eighty-eighth.

By the President: Abraham Lincoln

William H. Seward, Secretary of State

Wednesday, November 13, 2024

Listen to those who don't agree with us

 

As fellow children of our Heavenly Father, it would do us well to talk with and listen to the thoughts and ideas of those who don’t agree with us. If we do this with an open heart, we’ll be blessed to understand one another and become a force for peace.

https://x.com/PatrickKearon/status/1855988863824777724

Friday, November 8, 2024

Post-election reaction

Absolutely the perfect tone everyone should emulate after the American election:


The First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints issued the following statement on Wednesday, November 6, 2024:   We congratulate President-elect Donald Trump on his election as the 47th President of the United States of America. We invite all to pray for him, other elected officers, and leaders of nations around the world. Praying for those in public office is a long tradition in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Given the difficult challenges of our day, it is vital that we look to God for guidance and blessing and seek to be peacemakers in our homes and communities.   We commend Vice President Kamala Harris for her candidacy and thank her and President Joe Biden for their public service at the nation’s highest levels. We wish them both well for the years ahead.   May all our local, national, and world leaders be blessed with wisdom and judgment as they fulfill the great public trust afforded to them.


https://x.com/Ch_JesusChrist/status/1854365605060878729


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Wednesday, October 16, 2024

Depolarizing within

In our pursuit of clarity, charity and understanding, we note an article from NPR discusses a program from Braver Angels called "Depolarizing within."

https://www.npr.org/sections/shots-health-news/2024/10/14/nx-s1-5057929/anxiety-stress-politics-election-2024-polarization?utm_id=23122126&orgid=213&utm_att1=

Excerpts:

Here’s a question to ask yourself:

“How often do I feel a rush of pleasure with friends when we ridicule those ‘crazies’ on the other political side?”

This comes from an exercise in a course called Depolarizing Within, created by Braver Angels, a group that aims to help Americans bridge the political divide.

Be honest with yourself if the answer is “often.” Another part of the course asks you to consider the words you use: If you lean blue and words like “anti-immigrant” or “bible-thumper” come to mind, or if you lean red and you’re thinking “elitist” or “unpatriotic,” then your inner polarizer is alive and well.

Labels can dehumanize the opposing side especially when they don’t reflect the complexity of people’s views.

.....

“We’re not trying to get people to start agreeing,” Staehli says. The goal is to turn down the temperature, “to stop hating each other,” she says. And, through dialogue, to see past labels, stereotypes and division.

Christensen says this works because “they’re not criticizing the other side. They’re not putting them down. They’re not adding to the problem. They’re working on actually resolving it.”

Oftentimes, Staehli says, people will find common ground as they consider others’ beliefs and values. They start to see how compromise might be possible.

.....

If this election cycle is causing you distress or tension with people you know, here are ways to depolarize yourself and talk to those you disagree with.

1. Notice stereotypes in your own thinking

Braver Angels’ Staehli says stereotyping, dismissing, ridiculing and contempt are “the four horsemen of polarization.” The group’s online depolarizing workshop teaches how to counter these attitudes in yourself.

.....

2. Next, ‘edit the story’

Once you see your own attitudes clearly, Braver Angels has you rethink the story you tell yourself about people with opposing views. Here are a few starting points, adapted from the course:

Acknowledge that the other side is more varied than the stereotype and that their views are more complicated than the rhetoric you’ve been hearing.

.....

3. Limit consumption of polarizing news

“We are absolutely drawn to the “us versus them narratives,” Israel says. Through evolutionary hardwiring we tend to adopt a team sport mentality, she says. And much of cable news reinforces this polarizing storyline, emphasizing controversy and division.

“The more people tune into news that caters to one side or the other, the more skewed their perceptions of people on the other side is going to be,” Israel says.

.....

4. Curate your social media feed and watch for misinformation

Research finds some social media limits your exposure to viewpoints that differ from your own. So it's important to take control of what you are seeing on these platforms.

It’s easy to share or like messages that reinforce our biases. If the message slams a person on the other side, but fails to teach you anything or offer a solution, ask yourself if it’s really helpful, says Israel. If the answer is no, don’t like or share it. And consider unfollowing groups or individuals that repeatedly spew one-sided or scornful messages or misinformation.

.....

5. Get engaged in community groups

The opposite of scrolling is to actually engage with other humans.

“It turns out, that’s a wonderful thing for us to do,” Israel says. And not only can we spend more time with family and friends, but we also get involved in our community. This may help counter political – and social – isolation. Plus, “it’s actually good for our mental health to volunteer,” she says.

.....

6. How to talk through difference

When it comes to resolving conflict, people are not going to hear you – or your point of view – until they feel heard. This is why listening and acknowledging is so key to the Braver Angel’s approach to bridge-building. “You do it over and over again,” Staehli says until the other person feels heard. This can help establish good will.

So here’s the Braver Angels’ process for how to have a productive conversation with someone across the political divide.

The first step is to listen. Then ask questions with curiosity, Braver Angels’ Elizabeth Christensen suggests. “What was behind that? Why did you do that? Where are you coming from?” 

Next, acknowledge what the other person said. You don’t have to agree, just acknowledge that you've heard them, Christensen says.  Ask: Did I hear you correctly? Is this what you’re saying? “It’s acknowledging that you understand where they are at,” she explains.

And then there’s the pivot. Ask if you can share a different perspective. It’s like the turn signal on a car – you give people a heads up you may have a different viewpoint. “Then they are prepared to listen to you instead of responding to you – hopefully!” Christensen says.

Then offer your perspective. Use non-polarizing language. Finally check in with them to make sure they’ve heard you.

Both Christensen and Staehli have used these skills in conversation with their own families. “They work incredibly well,” Christensen says.

7. Cultivate empathy and compassion

In a polarized situation, people are very empathetic toward people on their own side, but very not empathetic toward people on the other side, Israel says. This can work against the goal of bridge-building.

.....

Practicing loving-kindness meditation has been shown to improve social interactions and increase happiness which can lower symptoms of anxiety and depression. It’s also been shown to reduce stress.

Friday, September 27, 2024

People are undiscovered countries

 

Robert Greene
The greatest danger you face is your general assumption that you really understand people and that you can quickly judge them. Instead, you must begin with the assumption that you are ignorant and that you have natural biases that will make you judge people incorrectly. Each person you meet is like an undiscovered country, with a very particular psychological chemistry that you will carefully explore.

True understanding requires humility. Instead of assuming we know others, we should approach each person as an undiscovered world. Recognizing our biases opens the door to deeper, more meaningful connections. Exploration leads to growth. L